On Spies and Motherhood
Dear Mothers,
This open letter is born out of my observations and conversations with family and friends who are mothers. It is the brainchild of a woman, not yet a mother, who sees the burden your glorious role is on you. I will not seek to offer unsolicited advice on how to raise your children. Instead, while you are wading in the trenches of a very long war, I want to send provisions of encouragement and reminders of what is true about your role.
First of all, I see you. I see you loving your kids and trying your best to raise them well. I see you are ordinary women with a calling, often spent in the trenches. You are flesh and blood, so naturally, you grow battle weary. You are often forgotten or feel stuck. You even mistake your calling for your identity. I see you and admire you. I believe that there is no group in the world with more influence and strength than mothers. There is no president, Nobel prize winner, Olympian, writer, or artist; who has had the endurance, tenacity, or effect on society that a mother has.
Sexy Spies
After World War II, the United States gained many allies and respect. But she also exacerbated the ill feelings her enemies already had against her. So intense was the hatred of some that they decided to take America out. They knew they could not accomplish this by going to war against the US, so they hatched a plan. Communist Spies would infiltrate the ordinary fabric of the United States. Then, using radical, anti-Biblical, sexual ideologies, they would influence the next generation. After which, they would watch as the US tore away from its Judeo-Christian foundations. Their effort paid off in the 1960s when the sexual revolution broke out in the US, changing the country forever (Source: This Cultural Moment). To accomplish this lofty goal, the communist spies had to remember a few things:
One, to whom they belonged and therefore who they served. Their cause meant death to self and loyalty to the motherland.
Two, the United States was not home but an enemy foreign land.
Three, they were playing the long game. Success required patience.
What do Communist Spies Have to do with Motherhood?
Motherhood as a Believer has a very similar mission, which I think Mothers either don't see or don't remember. And therefore, they grow weary, frustrated, and perhaps even resentful of their role. But ladies, we are at war; we have an enemy. (1 Peter 5:8, Ephesians 6). This enemy hates everything God has called you to, but God is greater and will enable and equip you for the difficult but essential task of raising your children. Hebrews 11-13 reminds all believers of this reality (check it out).
A Biblical Worldview
Chapter eleven of Hebrews is a gallery of men and women whose portraits look very different from those around them. Why? It wasn't because they were special or unique in and of themselves. It was because they recognized that they were strangers and exiles on earth (Hebrews 11:13). They knew their Creator and King had an unshakeable city prepared for them. So when fiery trials (or self-centered kids;) claimed their hopes, relationships, position, comfort, and lives, they were not consumed by the loss. Faith is a bizarre exercise in radical living. Therefore, raising kids in enemy territory is too. I think mothers often believe the lie that their role is so ordinary that they are not extraordinary women of faith.
Unlike the Communist Spies, you are not incognito. That means that the battle of raising your kids is done on the front lines, not in the relative safety of an allied territory. Mother, because you are at the bloody messy front lines of a very long war (which in this cultural moment has become aggressively against Biblical womanhood and motherhood), you must recall what is true.
Motherhood requires you to remember to whom you belong. You are the Lord's (1 Peter 2:9).
Motherhood requires you to die to self and sacrifice, which is a beautiful act of worship! (Romans 12:1-2, 1 Peter 2:5)
Motherhood requires remembering this world (city) is not our home. You are to dwell and disciple in the in-between (Hebrews 11-13).
Motherhood means playing the long game. Discipling your children isn't accomplished by microwave methods (Galatians 6:9).
As I said in the beginning, I am not a mother. However, I have one. My mother may not have realized it, but she was an agent for Christ, living in a foreign land and playing the long game of motherhood and discipleship. And boy, there were times when I rallied against her, frustrated her, made her cry, but by God's grace, she endured. Her investment in my sisters and I has born fruit.
The effect the Communist spies had on the US is undeniable. Look what they did with their hatred and unrelenting loyalty. But I say, Mothers, look what you can do with the Love of Christ and your unrelenting allegiance to God and His Kingdom. Look how you can influence the generations to come! Seriously, the trenches are icky, but the reward is undeniable!
Sisters and mothers, your call is unlike any other in the world. I pray you would see your role as God sees it. I pray you would not grow weary while doing good. I pray you would flourish as you patiently (long-suffering) raise the hearts, minds, and souls of the next generation.
You are warriors burdened with a glorious purpose, but what beautiful warriors you are!
“To be Queen Elizabeth within a definite area, deciding sales, banquets, labours, and holidays; to be Whitely within a certain area, providing toys, boots, cakes and books; to be Aristotle within a certain area, teaching morals, manners, theology, and hygiene; I can imagine how this can exhaust the mind, but I cannot imagine how it could narrow it. How can it be a large career to tell other people about the Rule of Three, and a small career to tell one's own children about the universe? How can it be broad to be the same thing to everyone and narrow to be everything to someone? No, a woman's function is laborious, but because it is gigantic, not because it is minute.”
-G.K. Chesterton
