Thank You, Chuck
When I think of the word pastor, much comes to my mind conceptually. I recently wrote about that in this article to introduce this series of posts. But when I think personally, the first person that comes to mind is Chuck Rustin.
Pastor Chuck is the longest-tenured associate staff member at Grace Family Church in Port St. Lucie, FL. He oversees member care and small groups. Grace Family was my home church throughout my childhood, teenage years, and early adulthood. I was saved there, baptized there, and raised in my faith there. I also served on staff for about ten years, in both technical support and leadership capacity. To say that I am familiar with Grace Family and Pastor Chuck would be an understatement.
In my time knowing him, Pastor Chuck has modeled the love of Jesus and exemplified what it means to care for people with both compassion and conviction.
By compassion, I mean that Pastor Chuck proactively moves toward people he knows are struggling – whether they are sick or going through some form of suffering, or possibly in a cycle of sinful behavior. If he’s not moving toward people himself, they often seek him out, and he opens his office, his ears, and his heart to them. He will soon be approaching thirty years on pastoral staff at Grace Family and has years of prior leadership experience elsewhere. He has shouldered heavy burdens alongside so many over the years. As my thoughts on pastoring and, specifically, pastoral care have developed over the last five years, I continue to recognize how regularly Pastor Chuck was, and is, an example of shepherding worth emulating.
By conviction, I mean that Pastor Chuck considers the Word of God and the leading of the Holy Spirit in his ministry. He is thoughtful, but does not settle for speaking anything less than what he believes should be said. This is true in the pulpit when he is tasked to speak, and in the everyday conversations he regularly has with people in counseling, small groups, and impromptu. While we have had disagreements on some topics at times (for example, how could someone regularly choose the teriyaki chicken and mixed greens at Panda Express, not the orange chicken and fried rice!?), I have great respect for his outright refusal to compromise.
I think most people would generally agree that these two characteristics are true of Chuck. But since these posts are personal reflections, I want to include a few stories that bring these ideas to life.
My Temper and My Truck
I am not sure he will remember this, but I certainly do. I will spare all the details, but here’s the gist: I am in my early-to-mid 20s – an adult in certain respects, but still a kid in others. At the time, I was on staff for a few years, and a dating relationship I was in had recently ended. In short, it ended because my partner and one of my friends decided they were to be together instead of my partner and me. Obviously, I was hurt.
It was all still fresh when the two of them came to a Sunday morning service. I don’t remember everything; I think I got through the service without issue. But some time after the service ended, I saw them walking out of the building and into the parking lot. In his book Good and Angry, David Powlison describes two kinds of anger: “dark, cold anger,” and “white-hot anger.” Mine was of the “white-hot” variety in that moment.
As I saw them walking, I was immediately enraged. I was in my truck, and I just gunned it. I floored the pedal and took off. As if that wasn’t problematic enough, I decided not to stay on the pavement and instead drove straight through the grassy open field in front of the building. I drove as fast as I could without destroying the truck (a little Nissan – no off-roader!), probably going slightly airborne on a bump or two. My former partner, my friend, a few others, and, of course, Pastor Chuck witnessed all of this.
I made it to the main road and drove off toward my house. Seconds passed, and my phone was already ringing. It was Pastor Chuck. I picked up. In that moment, he would have been totally justified in berating me. By the time I reached the road, I had already realized I'd expressed my anger in a very childish way. My choice was erratic, dangerous, foolish, and stupid behavior. I expected him to reinforce these realizations. But there was no raised voice and no lecture. Instead, a calm question: “Andrew, is everything OK? Are you having a family emergency? The way you left has me very concerned for you.”
I reassured him everything was OK, that I was just upset about something and had handled it poorly, and was sorry. He said something along the lines of, “OK, drive safely, see you Tuesday,” hung up, and that was that. He never brought it up again, but I often think back and appreciate how he overlooked something that could have (rightly) been addressed more severely. In doing so, he gave grace to a hurting young man still learning emotional maturity. That his concern was not for the grass, my poor behavior, my reputation, or the reputation of the church, but simply for me, was a lesson in kindness.
A Memorable Introduction
Pastor Chuck would offer this to you himself, so I don’t think he would mind me telling you: he does not like speaking for Sunday services. He doesn’t have to do so often, but on occasion, he is asked to. In my time on staff, he often described the preparation process as: “a labor of love…emphasis on labor.” Yet, no matter how long he prepared, what his topic was, or the tone of the message, one thing was always, always the same – his introduction. I can hear it in my head, and practically quote it to you without referencing a past video:
"Good morning, Grace Family. My name is Chuck Rustin, I serve as a pastor overseeing member care, small groups, and some other things here around the church. I have been on staff for XX years. I am married to the young woman here in the front row: my beautiful, godly wife Julie. We have been married for XX years, and we have two children…
For some, it might seem to be a general, expected introduction for a “guest” speaker. But anytime I heard that introduction over the years, I would get a little teary-eyed before he got through it (sometimes, he would, too!). I don’t know everything about Pastor Chuck, but one thing I know with absolutely, unwavering certainty is that he loves his wife, and I think anyone who knows him knows that, too.
Some hear it publicly, as above, but I’ve had many chances to hear variations and expansions of those thoughts in private over the years. Chuck has always spoken kindly, respectfully, and admirably of Julie, no matter the setting or situation. That always stood out during my single/dating/engaged/not-sure-what-I-am-doing years. Now that I am married, I hope to treat my wife with the kind of love that Chuck has long shown to Julie (who, by the way, is a lovely, wonderful person in her own right).
Full Circle
Speaking of marriage, when Chantelle and I started dating and moved quickly toward engagement, Chuck was the only one person I could envision doing our pre-marriage counseling or our wedding. I believed our years of working together and genuine friendship would be helpful insight and wisdom, and that it would mean a lot to me to include him. Knowing Chuck as a generous man, I reached out and asked if he would do both. But knowing him to also be both a practical - and busy - man, I wasn’t sure he would, especially since I was no longer at Grace Family and Chantelle and I were in church transition.
Ultimately, he agreed to do both. He did our pre-marriage counseling on his own time; opening is home to us on his one day off each week, and he usually met with us longer than originally allotted. He did this willingly, with excellence and care, for many weeks. Months later, he conducted our wedding ceremony, taking days of his vacation time to travel over twelve hours to an out-of-state destination, then turn around and return to ministry obligations in Florida only a few days later.
As a funny aside, after the ceremony and small reception ended, Chantelle and I left for our honeymoon destination, and Chuck and Julie left for their own lodging. A few minutes into our drive, Chantelle remembered that none of us had signed the marriage license, which we needed signed right away because Chuck and Julie were leaving for Florida the next morning.
I called Chuck, told him the situation, and he gave me the address of his Airbnb. Keep in mind, all of this is in the rural mountains of northern Georgia – there are few lights, the neighborhood roads are gravel and elevated, and I had no idea where this place was. I almost drove the truck right off an embankment! Once we finally (barely) arrived, I couldn’t find the document at first, and Chuck couldn’t find his glasses! Chuck and I share many similarities, not least of which is our desire for things to be efficient and organized, and neither of those things described the situation as it unfolded! It was a comical turn of events, to say the least.
Closing Thoughts
I could easily tell dozens more stories, ranging from amusing (like when he was tasked with taking a selfie for the first time) to the sobering, serious realities of hardships in life and ministry (including, but not limited to, the deaths of friends and family, the pain of experiencing the hidden sins of people we love exposed, and the daily “weights and sins” of our own lives).
But let me end by saying, I am so grateful for Chuck and his impact on my life. He watched me grow up in church, navigate family struggles as a teenager, start to finally figure out who I was as a young man, fumble through the growing pains of early ministry, and witness and facilitate my marriage to my beautiful, Godly bride. He and Julie have also stayed in touch with Chantelle and I through the highs and lows of our early marriage, including miscarriages, births, child dedications, and medical diagnoses.
Through it all, Chuck has stayed true to who he is. He is compassionate, convicted, concerned, and caring. In short, Chuck Rustin is very Christ-like – one of the most Christ-like men I have had the privilege of knowing, working with, and befriending.
If you know and love Chuck, I invite you to share your own thoughts with him this month. If you have the privilege of seeing him every week, tell him in person rather than online. It’s not that it means more, but I believe gratitude is best expressed and received when it is embodied.
As for me, for now, this will have to do.
Pastor Chuck, if you’re reading, thank you, and I love you.
Grace to you and peace from God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ. I give thanks to my God for every remembrance of you, always praying with joy for all of you in my every prayer, because of your partnership in the gospel from the first day until now. I am sure of this, that he who started a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus. Indeed, it is right for me to think this way about all of you, because I have you in my heart, and you are all partners with me in grace, both in my imprisonment and in the defense and confirmation of the gospel. For God is my witness, how deeply I miss all of you with the affection of Christ Jesus. And I pray this: that your love will keep on growing in knowledge and every kind of discernment, so that you may approve the things that are superior and may be pure and blameless in the day of Christ, filled with the fruit of righteousness that comes through Jesus Christ to the glory and praise of God. (Philippians 3:2-11 CSB)
